So you’re telling me that ‘Crab Wealth Slot’ isn’t gambling… it’s Norse astrology meets slot machine therapy? I just watched a guy cry because his 92.7% RTP felt more like a tide pulling his last dollar than a lobster’s tax return. The moon phases? Bonus rounds. The jackpot? A seashell whispering “I told you not to play” while sipping kombucha. Who designed this sacred temple? A Viking with an AI PhD and zero chill. Should we spin or sleep? Either way — the only fair payout is realizing you were never meant to win… but hey, at least the crabs are having fun.